WHAT IS FORGIVENESS?

"What were you doing when the towers came crashing down?" We've been asked that question often the past few days during the anniversary of 9-11-01. I was constructing the roadside sign for Epiphany Lutheran of Castle Rock, the mission church we had started in 1999. The roofer about 200 feet away called down to me what had happened on the east coast that morning.

What were you doing? A better question might be, "What have you been doing since then?" My pastor in his sermon yesterday spoke of our need to forgive our enemies, asking us to ponder Peter's question to Jesus, "How many times must I forgive my brother when he sins against me?" (Matthew 18:21)

I would like to re-phrase Peter's question: What does it mean to forgive my brother? What must I do when I forgive? What is forgiveness and what is it not? Let me try to help answer.

Forgiveness is giving up one's right of retribution, the right to strike back when evil has been done. Forgiveness is what the offended person does. Forgiveness is the hurt person releasing his/her hold on the one who has done the hurting. Forgiveness does not require repentance from the offender; it requires mercy from the offended. St. Paul showed us this in Romans 5:8: "While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

Forgiveness requires a change of heart for the offended person. This is why it can be so difficult, but also so liberating. But forgiveness is also necessary. Explaining the Lord's Prayer, Jesus made this clear: "If you do not forgive your brother his trespass, neither will your Father forgive your trespass." (Matthew 6:15) The unforgiving heart needs cleansing.

Withholding forgiveness does not harm the offender, it harms the offended. Consider the enraged parishioner, offended by his pastor or church, who shouts, "Don't give me any of that forgiveness junk!" Not forgiving hurts us and poisons our heart, not the object of our anger. Think about this, and then pray the words of this prayer:

"Heavenly Father, we come before you today to ask your forgiveness and to seek your direction and guidance. We know Your Word says, 'Woe to those who call evil good,' but that is exactly what we have done. We have lost our spiritual equilibrium and reversed our values. We have exploited the poor and called it the lottery. We have rewarded laziness and called it welfare. We have killed our unborn and called it choice. We have shot abortionists and called it justifiable. We have neglected to discipline our children and called it building self esteem. We have abused power and called it politics. We have coveted our neighbor's possessions and called it ambition. We have polluted the air with profanity and pornography and called it freedom of expression. We have ridiculed the time-honored values of our forefathers and called it enlightenment. Forgive us, Oh God, and search our hearts today. Cleanse us from every sin and set us free.  

Amen and Amen!