Today is my birthday, but I am not thinking much about it, because yesterday was the anniversary of the day 25 years ago when my first wife died in an auto accident. To those know this story I ask your pardon in rehearsing what you already know. I rarely speak of her, but today it seems right.
Sandra Oetting and I had been married just short of 16 years, and we had been blessed with two fine boys. We had married early and grown up together, moving from Ft. Wayne to St. Louis to North Dakota, then eventually to my first pastoral positions in North Dakota. We had just months before moved to Utah after southern California, and we were on our way to a "Welcome to Utah" party in Salt Lake City given by fellow pastors.
Thankfully we'd placed the boys with friends overnight, because at about 5 PM on May 4, 1984, our car went into an aerial spin and Sandy was thrown out and lived just two hours. And all I had were bruises and a cut finger.
Sandy was a shy, gentle, sweet woman, a good mother and caring wife. She enjoyed playing the piano, adored her little boys and was loyal to her friends. She loved her Lord and accepted my calling in life, doing all she could to help in ministry, as all pastor's wives so graciously do.
After her death I made the usual mistakes, but fortunately had understanding family, friends and colleagues. A few years later my boys and I were blessed with Carol who adopted them and accepted and loved me, warts and all. Twenty five years ago now, and I often wish she could have seen how well the boys turned out.
One thing is sure - God is in control of our lives, always. There is never a time He takes a vacation from His children. He never leaves us alone. And though we will have times in life we can't understand, God eventually makes sense of them to us. He shapes us by our experiences and we are better for it. Or not, of course, depending on our actions and faith in Him.
Sandy received God's highest gift at an early age. Now and then I wonder what life would have been like if the accident had not happened. God knows the reasons, and one day I will know more. Meanwhile, I give thanks for the blessings He has given through her, and am grateful that I learned a few lessons on my way down the road of life.
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight." (Proverbs 3:5-6)
Thank You, Lord, for those wonderful people who walk beside us on our journey.
No comments:
Post a Comment